The Holidays are here and present a wonderful time to reflect, gather together and share special time with friends and loved ones, acknowledge our many blessings, especially those in our lives who lift us up and make us better. Many go to great lengths to be together therefore, preparing to create special memories requires a little extra time and effort.
Knowing certain actions by others are predicable is important. Be mentally prepared to deal with imminent challenges.
Children are clearly part of the Holiday landscape… and what better time for adults to take the time to teach their children what is expected of them whether as a guest or, junior host. Teaching essential life skills now will reap big dividends later in life. Children need and want the attention and direction. Teach your children… how to shake hands and remember to explain the importance of making eye-contact. Practice pronouncing names with your children and remind them to use other people’s names when speaking with them. Show children how to hold a fork and knife and review basic table manners. Encourage children to answer questions with more than a simple “yes” or “no” answer and remember, children watch how you interact (or not) with others and so, know that your ‘actions speak louder than words!’
The Holiday Season means entertaining! Here are a few top tips for hosts and guests:
Time to dust off your good china, crystal, bring out the festive table linen and candles. Pre-select appropriate background music. Dress up your home, your table, your door, your yard and yourself. … Paper plates are for bar-b-ques
- Greet guests at the door. Have a designated coat area and offer to take coats or, coach your children (junior hosts) to do so…. again, great life training!
- Provide guests with initial refreshment then tell them to make themselves at home and help themselves, particularly with larger gatherings.
- Provide introductions and monitor conversation flow, alcohol consumption, music, replenishing food, etc.
- Never arrive empty handed.
- Circulate and contribute to the overall conviviality of the day. Resist the urge to hide in the kitchen and cluster or plant yourself in front of the T.V. all day.
- Guests are encouraged to spend quality time with some young person and ask about them. Say something to help with their confidence. Make children feel acknowledged, included, special.
- Guests should offer to help clean up.
- Scented candles in the bathroom.
- Have a designated coat/purse area
- A burnt candle wick reflects the warmth of the home.
Sitting and Seating: The host is seated at the head of the table. You honour the most important person (defer to age/gender socially and by rank/status professionally) by seating them to the host’s right. Couples should be separated unless newly married or newly engaged.
Grace and Toasting: Rule: “one should not even take a sip of water until after grace is said.” If anyone other than the host is going to be asked to say grace, one should be asked in advance, to prepare.
Eating: No one should begin eating until everyone is seated and served. The host initiates by picking up their utensils and saying something like “enjoy!” Bon appetite!etc.; be inclusive by making eye-contact with everyone at your table.
Serving and Clearing: Serve on the left, clear from the right. Pass food left to right (counter clockwise); no stacking or scraping plates at the table.
Remember, many have gone to considerable lengths to gather… and 90% is showing up! Therefore, contribute to help ensure a warm, memorable, peaceful day. Guests, thank your host for inviting you and hosts, thank your guests for coming. Guests remember to call and write a real thank you note, yes, even to relatives!
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