Someone once said, “Who you are in one area of your life is who you are in every area of your life.”
While we like to believe that we can shape-shift our way through life—showing up as the hard-driving-no-nonsense-guy with your team, as the agreeable-charismatic-company-man with those up-the-ladder, as everybody’s-buddy with colleagues, and as the fun-loving Dad at home—it doesn’t quite work that way. People know. They know when we’re different with different people.Related: Power: What You Can Do vs What Lights You Up
It affects our ability to influence—as people don’t know if they can trust or not. It affects the way we experience ourselves—for we can hide from many people, but deep inside we know what’s real. A chameleon only changes color to hideWe tell ourselves that we can’t succeed if we “don’t play the game.” Maybe we have it all wrong. Maybe instead of hiding who we are to fit in we need to grow who we are to stand out.
Because to make an impact, we have to do more than survive.
So unless you want to have employees who aren’t all-in, bosses who find you expendable, clients who aren’t loyal, and friends who hold you at arms-length, finding a way to compartmentalize less and risk getting real more might be in your best interest.
Because don’t fool yourself—people know.