We’ve all been taught that it’s better to give than receive. But, what if it was really the other way around? If we look deep into ourselves, we might realize that there is not a giving problem that stands in the way of our ability to receive what is right for us. Instead, for many of us, it’s actually a receiving problem. I often say, “we attract what we are prepared to receive”.
For many of us, receiving good fortune acts as a danger trigger to our automatic brain. For example, growing up you may have heard statements like, “those greedy business owners” or “blessed be the poor.” So fast-forward now to you as an adult. Let’s say you have a great idea for a new business and start getting some incredible breaks. As the days and weeks go by though, your enthusiasm wanes and you develop some anxiety, trepidation and even some sad, melancholic moods. This is because we have a primitive nature controlled by what I have called the automatic brain, or AB. This brain causes us to fight or flee what it detects to be dangerous. If success somewhere in your data banks equates with greedy, then your AB will cause you to fight or flee it.
The Big Three “Danger” Triggers
Money, health and relationships are the big three danger triggers. Ever been involved in a great relationship, or experienced good fortune and found yourself wondering when everything was going to go sour? Triggers often can leave us anxious and feeling like the other shoe is getting ready to drop.
What if you won the lottery tomorrow? Would that take care of all of your problems? I doubt it. Because if you are not used to such wealth, in other words it is unfamiliar to you, or your family associated greed with and disgust for people who had money, then your AB will cause you to fight or flee it. How will that show itself? Likely, with failed relationships, careless use of the money, or worry about health concerns.
Accepting Our Good Fortune
When good fortune occurs, one must accept it without any preconceived notions of what it might mean. Receive any gift with open arms. Feelings of guilt or obligation always arise from our primitive nature located in our AB, which stores all the data that (usually from childhood) of what it means to be a good person. When we learn to receive, with no strings attached—that is, not believing that our good fortune is somehow dangerous, as dictated by our AB—we then position ourselves to want to give on our own terms, with no strings attached, either.
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