What Wise Women Do After Divorce

Tanya-Marie Dubé is a master of transformation.

She has lived through some very traumatic experiences: from being born into the foster care system, to being homeless from ages 12 to 18, to leaving her marriage of 18½ years without her home or any finances. Through each adversity, Tanya was able to change her perspective and come out a stronger, happier person. Now she teaches women around the world how to thrive after divorce. She joins Stacy Francis to talk about the five stages of transformation and things women need to know to create the best life possible for themselves and their families.

Tanya says that her life has presented her with a series of transformational opportunities. She started to study psychology at age 17 and inadvertently started to coach others.

She learned that the only way for her to grow was to help others achieve their goals.

[4:18] By the time Tanya left her marriage 3½ years ago, she had been out of the workforce for more than a decade. Information about how to survive through and after divorce was hard to find. This inspired her to put together her first online summit where she invited 21 experts to speak on every aspect of separation. Over 300,000 women have been impacted to date. [5:22] There is a time and place for tears and anger when you’re experiencing a divorce. However, when you're rebuilding your life after divorce you need to remove the emotion out of it some of that time so you can focus on what’s working. [9:12] Tanya shares why gratitude and meditation is vital, no matter what you’re going through. [10:51] Stacy asks about the five stages of transformation after divorce. Tanya says that the five steps are building blocks and you’re going to be in and out of them, much like the grief cycle. She emphasizes that you need to work with someone because you need a new perspective and a mindset shift. [13:36] The five stages of transformation are: Visionary: building a new foundation by working on your belief systems. This stage focuses on aligning who you think you are with who you want to become. [13:58] Renewal: self-love and reconnection to spirituality. You learn how to overcome your addiction to people-pleasing and putting yourself last. You begin to take charge of your healing and personal development. [17:30] Alignment: busting through your comfort zone. If you push yourself out of your comfort zone, you’re going to move forward. The confidence you gain by doing so will propel you into other areas of your life and open doors and opportunities you never dreamed of. [22:24] Courage: finding your true purpose. Tanya shares the simple but powerful exercise she used to find her purpose. [26:41] Powerful: creating incredible relationships. Now that I found my purpose, how am I going to achieve it? Who do I need to surround myself with? How can I become the best version of myself so that I’m showing up for everybody else the right way, but I'm also attracting people at this high ener. Related: Understanding the Challenges of Spousal and Child Support