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Why We Get Stuck While Others Don’t

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At one time or another, we all of feel stuck. We’re in one place and we’d like to be in another. Whether that place is a different career, a different partner, or simply in a warmer climate, we all fantasize about the possibilities of what life could like if only things were different.

For the majority, that dream is where it ends.

For a smaller group, that dream makes them more unhappy about their current state.

For an even smaller group, that dream is what fuels them to create change.

SO WHAT MAKES SOME OF US WALLOW WHILE OTHERS TAKE ACTION?

It isn’t about time management, fears, or an IV drip of coffee. It’s about reframing how you look at it.  Here’s the simple, key difference:

When we are pissed that things don’t look the way we want, we tend to focus on “why.”

  • Why aren’t I getting paid more?
  • Why isn’t my partner helping out around the house?
  • Why can’t my dog do anything remotely like those dogs I see on Youtube?

It seems reasonable. Knowing “why” sounds like a great way to get to the underlying cause and then fix it. But, as anyone who’s spiraled into the vortex of “why” knows, it keeps you stuck. It focuses on blame. And, it rarely changes anything.

So, I’d like to introduce you to your new alternative.

It’s proactive.

It’s tactical.

It’s empowering.

It’s “how.”

  • How can I create opportunities to bring in more money?
  • How can I get my partner to help out around the house?
  • How can I train my dog to do more than eat my shoes and lick himself?

“How” gives us the ability to look at the role we play in creating our situation. Sure, I’d much rather blame everyone else, but that only gets me so far. Until you ask yourself “How have I created this situation?” you’re likely to remain in the same place.

THE OUTCOME:

You change your behavior. You try something new. You let go of people, places, and things that no longer align with what you truly want.

MY CHALLENGE TO YOU:

Look at how you’ve contributed to the situation. Then, change what doesn’t work for you. Yes, it’s that simple. 

How will this shift help you?

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